10 Reasons Why I’m Just an Awkward Lump of Social Anxiety

1.) I’m still nervous to make appointments for myself over the phone. Or in person.
2.) A lot of people often think I’m mean or snobbish just because I turn into Mr. Darcy whenever I’m faced with a new social setting. It’s just a defense mechanism okay?!           3.) I’m quite frequently mistaken for being mysterious just because I never want to talk to anybody and therefore divulge nothing about myself.
4.) I trip over air.
5.) If someone says hi to me in passing or smiles at me, I’ll either grimace or make some unintelligible noise.
6.) My dream job includes very little to no human interaction whatsoever or at least doesn’t require me to talk in front of people.
7.) I feel much more eloquent and assured when talking through paper than in person.
8.) I have no idea what “flirting” means. Is that some kind of normal person lingo?
9.) How I dealt with crushes was to completely ignore them and repress my feelings until it eventually went away. It’s worked so far.
10.) My fingers are more like flimsy chopsticks than actual digits, seeing as how I’ve hurt myself more often than not just by gesturing a little too enthusiastically.

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